Saturday, April 5, 2008

Being southern

As a southerner who was raised in Utah, it seems appropriate that I would start this blog in April. Most people make New Years resolutions and start the year off with a bang. That's not how it works in the South. Things take time. You need to think about things and let them grow until you decide you have waited long enough and it might be time to start acting on that thing you've been thinking about. I believe this tradition started a long time ago.

Alabama is HOT. In the summer it gets so hot and humid that you don't want to do anything except sit next to your air conditioner. I love the line from To Kill a Mockingbird that says "Ladies bathed before noon, after their three-o'clock naps, and by nightfall were like soft teacakes with frostings of sweat and sweet talcum." Obviously, air conditioning has helped the South quite a bit. If you don't go outside you don't have to shower three times a day; however, you still sweat like crazy the second you step outside. Because of the heat, people from the south had to do everything very slowly. I believe that is why southerners are considered slow in other parts of the country. I think time has been great for the south. I live in a beautiful little city that has been protected by Baptists for years. This means no bars, no bowling alleys, no movie theaters, and a nice safe place to raise your family. The most negative thing you can say about the city is that they don’t have sidewalks. Apparently this is a southern tradition too. Maybe if they think about it they will install sidewalks in a few years. From the time we moved here three years ago there has been talk of putting in a movie theater. We have not seen it yet, but they did clear some land for one about 6 months ago!

These, my friends, are the reasons why I am truly southern. I believe the art of procrastination has been practiced and honed to the point of near perfection (I say “near” because there is always room for improvement in our lives).

1 comment:

Young Baldwin said...

: )
The day sidewalks are installed in Gardendale is the day pigs fly.This Alabama we are talking about right?Well,I suppose it's not just Alabama it's the south in general.They are known for being lazy.Exercise hello people.
As for the movie theater,it was going to be a mall.Then G'dale First Baptist put a stop to it.They said,"That would be unchristian like."Then people wanted the theater.They again found fault with this.It was put a stop to.
Hot!!!Please lady!Your on your own for this one.
You failed to talk about the most annoying things of all.These would be southern accents and the southern grammar."I ain't got no pencil," and not to mention "Y'all ain't got no pencil I could have." "Y'all" and "Ain't" I hate those words.

_Irish Lunatic_
_Orla_