Raising Children Unto the Lord

I know I am posting like crazy today, but I had one last thing to blog about. I also gave a talk today on the subject of raising children unto the Lord. I can't take the credit for this one. It was pure inspiration. So here's a few excerpts (since it was almost 6 pages typed).

I’ll start by relating this short story that was included in Sister Hinkley’s biography. Sister Hinkley said “The rewards of mothering are not immediate. There are times when you are less than appreciated. I took from the oven one day what I thought was a beautiful casserole, only to have my six-year-old son say, “Mom, how come you baked the garbage?”

My focus today is on raising children unto the Lord. My first thought was that I’ve only been a mom for 5 years. There is no way my personal experiences can enlighten or enrich others who have far more experience. So I will defer to the experts. When outlining my talk I used Elder Nelsons talk from April’s Conferance as a rough outline of what I wanted to share with you today.

Elder Nelson also said: “We are also to teach our children to honor their parents. The fifth commandment states, “Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.” Why do we teach our children to honor their parents? As a child I never understood this principle. I assumed it had something to do with making life easier for my parents. I liked what one member (Peiro) said in September s Ensign. “At this stage in their lives, our young sons are especially learning to obey their parents.” This member, Piero, hopes this will help them learn to obey Heavenly Father, arming them with the strength and testimony necessary to remain faithful throughout their teenage years and beyond.

The Lord gave us ALL specific instruction on how to best raise our children unto the Lord

Back to Elder Nelsons talk. “No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;

“By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile—

“Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy.” I think this is one of the most difficult things to do as parents. How do we “reprove with Sharpness” only when the Spirit tells us too? It’s sometimes difficult to feel the Spirit when our child has just done something that makes us feel angry like talking back, punching a sibling, spilling an entire gallon of milk and then laughing, or flooding the bathroom. And yet these are the crucial times when we should be listening for guidance.

When a child needs correction, you might ask yourself, “What can I say or do that would persuade him or her to choose a better way?” When giving necessary correction, do it quietly, privately, lovingly, and not publicly. If a rebuke is required, show an increase of love promptly so that seeds of resentment may not remain. To be persuasive, your love must be sincere and your teachings based on divine doctrine and correct principles.

Do not try to control your children. Instead, listen to them, help them to learn the gospel, inspire them, and lead them toward eternal life. You are God’s agents in the care of children He has entrusted to you. Let His divine influence remain in your hearts as you teach and persuade.

Sister Hinkley said “We have a great responsibility to our children. Find joy in them. Don’t over schedule them or yourself. You may not be able to take them on exotic vacations. It doesn’t matter. When the day dawns bright and sunny, take an excursion to the canyon or park. When it’s cloudy and wet, read a book together or make something good to eat. Give them time to explore and learn about the feel of grass and the wiggliness of worms.

So how do we know if we’re doing it right? Some things are obvious, like whether or not to let your one-year-old play in the street, but so many other things seem to be in an impenetrable gray area. For the last few weeks I’ve had a Michael McClean song floating in my head. Some of you may have heard this song before, but for those that haven’t, I’ll recite a few of the lyrics. I edited a little, but it basically goes like this

Every sleepless night knows many parents who are wondering if they’ve done alright. And we all know more than our share of those sleepless nights. Had they given their son too much freedom? Had they smothered their two teenage girls. Had they spoiled them too much or not trust them enough to prepare them for life in this world? So they opened their hearts to the heavens and they spoke of their children by name and the prayer that they prayed that their kids would be saved had a very familiar refrain.

Which part is mine, God which part is yours? Could you tell me one more time, I’m never quite sure and I won’t cross the line like I’ve done before, but it gets so confusing sometimes. Should I do more or trust the divine. Please just tell us Lord, which part is mine and which part is yours?

I know that if we pray, the Lord will answer our prayers. Especially when it comes to our precious children. I know that if we all work together as parents and as a ward family we can raise our children in a way that will enable them to see God in Heaven again. By following his teachings we will be able to raise our children up to the Lord.

In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen